This page is still very much 'in process'. The hope is to add new sections through 2025.
Core Practices
Practices included in this section:
Click the title to move to that section:
S T O P — A framework for practice
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Including: Prayers for Various Occasions - from Jewish Tradition
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There are more to come ...
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S T O P — A framework for practice
We can use the four letters of the word STOP as a framework for practice
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STOP can be used as a framework for a very short practice, perhaps no more than a minute or two. And it can be used to structure a longer practice, maybe 10 or 20 minutes, or even longer.
During a period of practice STOP can also serve as a framework or guide for 're-settling' after we realise our minds have drifted and we've become very distracted.
This is the practice:
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S Stop … settle, ... soften, ... smile, … maybe stretch ... maybe sigh.
We're not looking to be stiff or starchy. We're not looking to be static, nor like a statue set in stone ... But we are looking to be stable, settled, and 'something like' still.
I like the idea of 'setting towards stillness.'
Sighing can help release tension in (say) the shoulders. It can help us soften tight ot tense muscles. Smiling can help too. If we invite a smile onto the lips or into the eyes, that can help us soften and settle ... It can be soothing ...
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A bit of gentle stretching can also help tense muscles to soften. When stretching we should always be careful not to push things too far. Straining the muscles is not something we're looking for!
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T Take a few deeper and more deliberate breaths, two or three — or even half-a-dozen ...
These slightly deeper breaths needn't be anything too forced. They can be just that little bit deeper and slower, and we can be a little 'more focused' on the breath than usual. And then we allow the breathing to return to its own natural pace and depth and rhythm. We breath about 24,000 times a day, whether we're watching the breath or not. During the greater part of the STOP practice we try simply to let the breathing look after itself ... We don't look to control of manage the breathing in any particular way.
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O Open awareness (This will often be the longest section in our four-step practice.)
We're invited to open our awareness to —
the sensations of our breath​ in our body
to the 'tone' or 'feel' of our body more generally
to our emotional ‘tone’
to the ‘tone’ of our thinking
to the world around us. That is:
to sounds, to things like the movement of the air around us, to the touch of clothing on the body, to sensations where our body it makes contact to whatever is supporting us, to any scents or odours that might arise. This is all a matter simply of noticing and of allowing, without any judgment or discrimination (insofar as we can manage that).
In a longer practice we might settle here to being with a chosen focus — be that the breath, scanning (more or less systematically) through the body, or to being with our chosen phrase, or perhaps some other 'anchor'.
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P Proceed — move on into whatever comes next … taking with us, as best we can,
something of any stillness or settledness we may have moved towards during the practice.
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Here, with proceed, can we look not simply to 'jump back' to exactly where we were before we began the practice? That's something which it is often quite easy for us to do.) Can we instead move a little more steadily into whatever comes next?
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S T O P
Here's an analogy which links with what I've said about moving forward and proceeding at step four, and not simply jumping back to where we were before we began the practice. (Apologies if it's a bit 'nerdy.')
When we're looking to close down a computer running Microsoft Windows we're give two options. We can either 'Shut down' or 'Restart'. Microsoft recently explained that if we shutdown the computer what happens is that before the compute switches off Windows will save a lot of information about the various processes that have been running. That way, when we next turn on the computer it will be ready to 'carry on from where we were before.' With a computer that can be good. it means we can get to work very quickly. (We'll be back where we were.)
If we choose the 'Restart' option something different happens. The computer closes all the process that have been running and starts afresh, starts anew ... That's more like what we're looking for from our mindfulness practices: a reset, a restart, a new beginning.
An 'extra' that some people find helpful is to mark the start of the practice with some simple physical sign or movement.
We might make the sign of the cross, or briefly press our hands together or movement ...
I've heard of people 'shaking away' their tensions and stepping away from the busyness of things by briefly shaking or flapping their arms or hands.
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Alternatively, we might offer a very brief prayer of intention, sometimes called an arrow prayer, something like: 'Lord have mercy' or 'Come Holy Spirit'.'
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I guess with all of these, and especially with the more overt or conspicuous ones, we need to be sensitive about where we are and who we're with!
If we regularly use the STOP acronym as a framework or structure for our regular practice, we'll find we have it 'to hand,' and ready to be used when the pressures of life are on.
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For example, if we're late for an appointment and getting worried or perhaps we're getting anxious about an interview, we can remind ourselves, 'STOP' and then quietly work through the stages.
And while using the practice may not resolve all the issues we are facing, it may well help us get to a better place and better frame of mind for understanding what's happening and for relating to whatever comes next ...
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The Three-Breath Pause
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Coming soon - but it's really as simple as it sounds: Pause and for three breaths, simply be with the physical sensations of breathing as they are for you ... breath by breath ...
The Gratitude Practice
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The Gratitude Practice is a natural companion to the Loving-Kindness practice. You will see that they each follow a similar pattern.
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Between them, the two practices can open the way for us to be changed very deeply , completely transformed. We can become more compassionate, more cheerful, more fully who we are meant to be. Both of the practices are essentially simple, and both can also be done either formally (i.e., when we settle down for a time of quiet mindfulness practice), or informally (i.e., when we 'are out and about', and getting on with daily life). Many people like to use the practices when they wake in the night. (Sometimes the practices help them get back to sleep; and if not, even so, it's time well spent!)
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The Gratitude Practice — Guidance
We take a few easeful, slower, deeper breaths, and then settle towards stillness (as best we can). We may offer a simple prayer: Help us Lord, by your gift and your grace, to be more grateful, more appreciative of life, its blessings, and of all the opportunities you give us from growing in faith and hope and love. Amen.
Then we invite awareness and hold in our heart successively:
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1. Something are readily grateful for …
2. Something we take for granted (but could be grateful for),
3. Something we find 'somewhat challenging',
4. Our own self — important this!
(and don't we often find ourselves very challenging?!)
​At each step we look to God and say:
Heavenly Father, we hold these things before you,
and we look to you.
May we see (or come to see) your blessing in these things.
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We might end with a prayer:
We thank you for all the opportunities you give us for growing in faith and hope and love; by your gift and your grace, may we become. more and more, that blessing for others you would have each one of us be. We ask this in Jesus name. Amen.
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Important!
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Please keep in mind that we are not trying to persuade ourselves that these things are good or that we 'should be' grateful. This is especially important at Step 3.
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At each step (and especially at Step 3) when we call to mind something we find 'somewhat challenging', can we open to the possibility that there might be a blessing hidden within this thing, even if that blessing is well hidden? ​But if that blessing is well hidden, it won't help if we try to force ourselves to see it. Indeed, it would be counter-productive and almost dishonest. ​Until we are shown it, we don't know how to see the 'hidden' blessing! ​
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Extending the Practice
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There are various ways in which we can extend the practice, ways that can even help to heal the past, almost change it. For example, we might focus on our self at some particular stage of our life. For example, one day we might focus on our self as a child. Opening our awareness successively to (1) something we were spontaneously grateful for, (2) something we took for granted, (3) something we found 'challenging', and (4) on our life at that age as a whole.
We might do the same for our self at some other age; for example, as teenager, in our first job, as young parent, or whatever. Can we open to the possibility of seeing God's blessing upon us at each of those stages. If we do, we might we are opening to way to the healing of the past. We might find both that we rediscover joys we had forgotten about and also that some of the sting or hurt is eased from things that were once difficult for us. (But, as always, go gently when recalling or revisiting challenging memories.)
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As an alternative, we might look back and recall and work through the four stages focusing at each step on a person who for us at that time in our lives we found it (1) easy to be grateful that they were in our lives; took for granted and hardly noticed; found 'somewhat challenging'; and finally (again) looking to be grateful for our own life our own self at that time. (This alternative version of the practice is very close to a loving-kindness practice.)
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Feel free to 'experiment' with the practice. See what works for you.
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Blessings abound!
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Our opening payer, calling on the Holy Spirit, speaks of him as 'everywhere present, and filling all things' treasury of all blessings ...' He is always at work for our good, in all the circumstances of life though that can certainly be difficult for us to see or believe. this gratitude practice can help here.
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Once we get used to practising steps one and two we might well find ourselves more often being spontaneously grateful in the ordinary course of life. We appreciate life much more, find more joy, more to celebrate. How good is that!
Something similar might even arise in relation to using step four. Something of the 'sting' of difficult events and circumstances may be eased or somehow 'dissolve.' We may find this happening with things like difficult memories. This may apply even apply with things like difficult memories.
For example, no doubt we all know the experience of a memory of something embarrassing popping up, something that that makes us cringe. It may be something we deeply regret. But we may find that through the loving-kindness and gratitude practices can even take the 'sting', the 'cringe' out of these memories. (And we might see that this is yet another aspect of God's healing love. he invites us to be kind and grateful so that we can see how kind he is and how much, by his gift, there is to be grateful for.)
Guidance on what to choose at each step
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Step 1. We might find this step quite easy: We remember that we were spontaneously grateful for our first sip of tea in the morning, a beautiful sky at sunset, a special moment with a friend, a TV show we enjoyed — many possibilities!
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Step 2. And yet how easily we take for granted things that are really very special, and not enjoyed by everyone: we have food in the fridge, water in the taps, clothes and shoes to wear; we don't live in a war-zone; our phone or tablet usually works, we have friends who care for us; we have good health (all things considered) ...
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Step 3. The advice is to choose something that is not too challenging, perhaps something which, on a scale of 1 to 10, is down there at two or three. That means something with a bit of an edge to it — yes, it is challenging — but not something so challenging that to hold it in awareness might be overwhelming or might re-traumatise us. For example, we may have lost something we treasure, or perhaps we've damaged a a favourite piece of clothing or our favourite shoes.
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Step 4. We are invited to be grateful for our own life, and to do so in as simple a way as possible. We might focus in on something we find it easy to be grateful for: perhaps we like our hair, or appreciate our own sense of fun, or the fact we don't drop litter .... Or perhaps we turn to something we take for granted: our digestion, the fact we can see and hear (even if our sight and hearing are not all we might wish it were), or that we can read and count and tell the time ...
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God is at work in what we see as challenges and is ever looking to use even our failures to bring us to a deeper, richer, more compassionate and more loving life and to a deeper wisdom and understanding.
St Paul writes:
'... to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the community of the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.'
Ephesians 3: 20-21.
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Some 25 years before Paul was writing,
Jesus had said:
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'.. I want my joy to be in you and your joy to be complete. This is what I tell you: Love one another as I have loved you. '
John 15:10-11
From Jewish tradition: 'Blessings for Various Occasions.'
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In spring 2025 I put together a document looking at a set of prayers which are given in the prayer books of each of the three main traditions in contemporary UK Judaism (Orthodox, Reform and Liberal). These prayers are called, 'Blessings for Various Occasions', and I'd suggest that prayers like these can help us grow in mindfulness and learn to be present to the world around us with gratitude and kindness.
The second part of the document gives many examples of these blessings. Could they inspire us to make up similar prayers and blessings of our own?
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Find a PDF of the document at the button to the right.
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Blessings for Various
Occasions - from Jewish Tradition.
John H Walton is an Evangelical Christian and a leading authority of the world in which the Hebrew Bible (i.e., Old Testament) and then the New Testament came into being. In the following passage he says something that explains the kind of outlook shown in the prayers above:
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'In the languages of the ancient Near East, there is no such word as "religion." Likewise, there is no dichotomy between sacred and secular, or even between natural and supernatural. ...
In the end, there is only a distinction between the heavenly realm and the earthly one, but events in the two were often seen as intertwined or parallel. … The world was suffused with the divine. All experience was religious experience. …
All events had deity for their cause. Life was religion and religion could not be compartmentalized within life.’
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Ancient and Near Eastern Thought and the Old Testament’ p. 47
(John H Walton, 2018)
Blessings for Various Occasions,
from Jewish Tradition
Some examples ...
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Before Food:
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I bless you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, who create various kinds of food.
Before Wine:
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I bless you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, who create the fruit of the vine.
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On tasting any Fruit for the first time in the season; on entering a new house; or on using new clothing:
I bless you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, who has kept us in life and enabled us to reach this season.
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On witnessing Lightning, or on seeing Falling Stars, Lofty Mountains, or Great Deserts:
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I bless you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, who has made the creation.
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At the sight of the Sea:
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I bless you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, who has made the great sea.
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On seeing beautiful Trees or Animals:
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I bless you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, who has such as these in your world.
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On hearing Good News:
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I bless you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, who are good, and who does good.
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On Hearing Sad or Difficult News:
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I bless you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, the true Ruler.
Mindful Speech
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Jesus is the word of life. ... Our own words can hurt or heal.
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Before we say something, and especially in difficult times, when the pressure is on,
we might ask ourselves:
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What I am about to say …
Is it true?
Is it kind and helpful?
Is this the time to be saying it?
Very often it might be none of these things.
Imagine, for example, a husband and wife have arranged to meet up and head off for a friend's party. He's just had a hair cut. Maybe he's late arriving. Perhaps he's often late for things. She's not surprised, but is disappointed. She's maybe inclined to say, 'You're late. You are always late. I can never rely on you for anything.' When we're feeling a bit worked up it is easy to move from what's true to something which is not quite true or even to something which is not really true at all.' It's good if we can be aware of what we are doing. And of course, while he may often be late without good reason, perhaps this time there is a good reason.
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Often, of course, something might be true, but it might not be either kind or helpful, and this might not be the time to say it.
Imagine another situation, perhaps when our couple are once again meeting for the evening. This time she has just had a hair done and that this is the first time he's seen her since. It might be true that he thinks the hairdresser hasn't done very well. Maybe it has been cut too short. But it wouldn't be kind to say so. And this wouldn't be the time to say it. What is she to do? Return to the hairdresser and have the hair it stuck back on? Maybe next times she's talking about a visit to the hairdresser her husband might suggest he thought that the previous cut was a bit short and that longer hair suites her better. Or may ​suggest she tries a different hairdresser. That would be kind, helpful and timely.
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And what about the things we say to ourselves, the things that go on in our own heads? It can be helpful to have in mind the same principles:
Is what we say are saying to ourselves, true? Can we be sure it's true?
Is it kind? Is it helpful?
Is this the time to be saying these things to ourselves? (What, just before we go to bed? or the minute we have woken up?)
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Turning towards difficulties
'Turning towards difficulty' can sound very negative but
in reality is something very positive
This can be a very useful practice and can open the way to the deepest spiritual growth. It can unite us with Jesus in his work of overcoming and healing the world's disorder. We begin with the disorder in ourselves. (There's some background 'theory' on the page for Week 7 of the 8-week course. (Click here for that.)
It is very important with this practice to go steadily and very gently. If we try to rush things and take on more than we are ready for, that can turn out to be a backward step.
Mark Williams writes:
This different approach — namely, turning towards our difficulties — is one of acceptance of ourselves and of whatever is troubling us. It means turning towards it, befriending it, even when — indeed, especially when — we don't like it or it frightens us.
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For many of us, mentioning 'acceptance' is heresy of the first order, but this initial reaction stems from the frequent inability of individual words to convey true meaning. Acceptance in the context of mindfulness is not the passive acceptance of the intolerable. It is not 'giving up', nor is it resignation or spinelessness.
Neither is mindfulness anything to do with detachment — it is not about ‘not feeling anything’. Acceptance is a pause, a period of allowing, of letting be, of clear seeing. Acceptance takes us off the hair trigger, so that we’re less likely to make a knee-jerk reaction. It allows us to become fully aware of difficulties, with all of their painful nuances, and to respond to them in the most skilful way possible.
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This different approach is one of acceptance of ourselves and of whatever is troubling us. It means turning towards it, befriending it, even when – indeed, especially when — we don’t like it or it frightens us.
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For many of us, mentioning ‘acceptance’ is heresy of the first order, but this initial reaction stems from the frequent inability of individual words to convey true meaning. Acceptance in the context of mindfulness is not the passive acceptance of the intolerable. It is not 'giving up', nor is it resignation or spinelessness. Neither is mindfulness anything to do with detachment — it is not about 'not feeling anything'. Acceptance is a pause, a period of allowing, of letting be, of clear seeing. Acceptance takes us off the hair trigger, so that we’re less likely to make a knee-jerk reaction. It allows us to become fully aware of difficulties, with all of their painful nuances, and to respond to them in the most skillful way possible.
